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  • PSYCHEDFORTORAH

Learning Relationships


Rabbi Elazar ben Shammua said: let the honor of your student be as dear to you as your own, and the honor of your colleague as the reverence for your teacher, and the reverence for your teacher as the reverence of Heaven.

 

Rabbi Elazar ben Shammua’s message in this Mishna revolves around the essentialness of relationships to learning.

 

One of the most prominent findings in the character education and social-emotional learning literature is of the importance of building a classroom culture of respect and psychological safety. The teacher-student relationship is essential to learning both general content and to the spiritual, social, and emotional development of the students. A leading theory in the field is called self-determination theory, which proposes that for people to flourish, they need to experience a sense of autonomy, relatedness, and competence. In terms of autonomy, students should feel like they have some level of choice. Classes that incorporate democratic elements where possible help foster this sentiment. Relatedness intimates connection between students, teachers, and other key figures, fostering a sense of belongingness. Competence relates to self-efficacy, a student’s belief that he or she can accomplish and perform effectively in the classroom. Flourishing classrooms need to think critically and strategically as to how to cultivate these concepts.

 

In the classroom, this starts top-down. A dominant teacher who demands respect in an authoritarian way will not succeed. To gain the students’ respect, the teacher should respect the students. Hence, Rabbi Elazar’s first message: “let the honor of your student be as dear to you as your own.” This is the third time in the fourth chapter of Avot that a Mishna teaches that respect is better attained through giving it away to others. The novelty here is that the inverse would have been expected. Students are obligated according to Jewish law to honor their teacher. The moral and pedagogical lesson here is that the teacher should also honor the student. Moreover, as we have seen previously in the fourth chapter of Avot, it is through bestowing honor on others that one attains honored.

 

Midrash David, a medieval commentary on Pirkei Avot controversially attributed to Maimonides’ grandson, presents a fascinating analysis of this teacher-student relationship which comports to many modern educational psychological notions related to the classroom. He writes that when a teacher honors his student by demonstrating love for him and praising his abilities, the student’s heart will be opened, he will be filled with positive emotions, and have increased understanding of the content. The opposite is true of a teacher yells, disrespects the student, and consistently points out flaws. This will not lead to motivation, success, or growth. If a student is struggling, the teacher should reflect a pleasant countenance, praise the student’s effort, and provide clear and positive strategies for the student to improve.

 

Midrash David’s approach aligns well with Dr. Carol Dweck’s motivational strategies to increase growth mindset. Students need to believe that improvement is possible, and that is impacted by parents and teachers praising hard work and perseverance, instead of just accomplishment. These social-emotional factors will impact intellectual and educational achievements just as much, if not even more than intellectual abilities or the scholastic expertise of the teacher.

 

But culture is not limited to the classroom. Interactions throughout the whole building need to be infused with the same sense of comradery and respect. As Rabbi Elazar continues, “the honor of your colleague” needs to be as beloved “as the reverence for your teacher, and the reverence for your teacher as the reverence of Heaven.” How colleagues relate to each other in the teachers’ room and beyond, what conversations they have about students, and how they think about and treat administrators and mentors is essential. The same applies for how administrators relate to teachers and staff. The healthier these dynamics, the better intellectual, spiritual, and character growth in the school.

 

Rabbi Marc Angel encapsulates the peer relationship ethos amongst teachers, writing, that this  “attitude engenders a congenial learning environment based on friendship and common striving for knowledge. It diminishes egotism, one-upmanship, and contentiousness. The goal is not to outsmart one’s peers, but to work together to attain greater insight.” Abarbanel adds that when social relationships amongst peers are healthy, more learning happens. Good learning is social in nature; we learn with and from each other. Social constructivist theories of education emphasize the importance of collaborative learning opportunities. Literature on the dynamics and interplays of chavruta learning by Elie Holzer and Orit Kent bear this out as well.

 

Finally, in terms of how we relate to mentors, there is an intense sense of dependency and indebtedness that leads Rabbi Elazar to such an extreme claim to revere our teachers as much as we revere Heaven. Besides for the gratitude and acknowledgment of reliance, there may be another element here as well. By revering our teachers, we learn through the interpersonal social dynamics how to revere God as well. It is through these relationships that we can better foster a spiritual relationship with God.

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